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Giambi Named Administrator of DEA

McGwire, Canseco to his Cabinet

Tito Jackson

Issue date: 3/30/05 Section: The Triangle

On Monday, 28 March 2005, the Yankees' first baseman Jason Giambi was named Administrator of the Drug Enforcement Agency just three days after former Administrator Karen Tandy stepped down from the position on 25 March.

Tandy had been Administrator since 31 July 2003, and decided to step down because she felt that "someone with better knowledge" should be in charge. With her departure, President Bush felt that the DEA needed a complete shake-up, and left Giambi with the task of filling the now voided positions underneath him.

Giambi named Jose Canseco as his Deputy Administrator and Mark McGwire as his Chief of Operations just hours after he had been confirmed as Administrator. It is expected for him to name former governor of Minnesota Jesse "The Body" Ventura as Chief Inspector later this week.

Giambi said, "Canseco is the best man for the job, he's been in charge of administrating since before I was in college, and McGwire is going to be a great Chief of Operations. He's been operating since Canseco retired. The only reason I need Jesse around because I don't want Canseco and McGwire to feel like the need to walk on pins and needles. Ventura will be there to help them with the ins and outs.

During his inauguration, Giambi said, "It is an honor to have this job. But in all honesty, getting to this point in my life has been a real pain in the butt."

His former employer George Steinbrenner, owner of the New York Yankees, did not appreciate his references to steroids. After briefly whispering with his right-hand man, the Yankee's General Manager Brian Cashman, Steinbrenner said, "I pay this guy how much money for him to take 'juice in his caboose'? Now the government is paying him to stay clean. We won't win another World Series for a while."

Immediately after greeting the press and thanking all of those who helped get him to where he is now, Giambi got right down to business. He said, "My first order of business is to start an all-out promotion against steroids based on the fact that we think they are bad. My mommy always said not to take them. As you can see I didn't listen, which is why I hit for .300 plus averages and hit 40 plus homers in a season. But they really hurt when the needle initially pierces the skin."

Giambi said that he also planned on ending cocaine trading rings coming out of Latin America. He said, "There are a lot of Hispanic baseball players that are either involved in this ring, used to be in this ring, heard of this ring, or know nothing of this ring. No matter what they are the cause of it and we can stop it."
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